When I get done with school, I am going to start a design firm. I am going to get a small business loan and rent out a bunch of space in one of those midtown office buildings, with the shitty hermann miller gray carpet and the drop ceilings. I will then hire a bunch of youthful unknowns from RISD, CalArts, MCAD, Van Eyck Academy, RCA, and whatever the fuck. The deal is going to be as follows: if you work for me, you can use a computer, but it has to be THE MAINFRAME. Cuz, see, I will buy a mainframe and install it, and as for computers, that will be it, in terms of what is allowed in the office. Powerbooks (or rather, excuse me, “mac book pros”) will get checked at the door, much like the bag-check arrangement at The Strand and other such commercial outlets. So if you are a guy, you will invariably look like this:

… and if you’re a girl, you’ll look like this:

… I should mention at this point that these images are not at all intended to suggest gender-normative role designations; sometimes, if you’re a guy, you’ll change the tapes, and sometimes girls will use the light pen to draw shit. The pursuit of such activities will be a product of what needs to get done in the workplace, rather than whether you have a dick or a pussy, essentially. Just so you know. Yes.

Anyway. By enforcing such constraints, I will conjure the eternal spirit of Paul Rand, who will fuse his undead powers with my own mortal body in exchange for avenging his disgrace and slaying the dickfaces responsible for the perversion of the UPS logo. After this, I will be unstoppable, and I will rule the design world with an iron fist, sitting atop my humming mainframe, cackling to myself in the dark.

Anyway that’s one career option. I might go to law school instead. Who knows.

-fish

please don’t go to law school, it’s too trendy and below you (like film school in the 90’s).
love the pictures by the way. did you notice the way they subtlely reinforce gender roles via the apparatus (the phallicity of the pen, the round o’s of the tape reels). masculine rigidity vs. feminine fluidity, for real.

hahaha most certainly, that’s an excellent observation… and but look at this one:

http://www.lileks.com/institute/compupromo/6.html

… the light pen guy is directly interfacing with the tape girl. sparks are indeed flying! it’s gendertastic.

-fish

fish,

your mainframe-driven design firm is sure to be a success. i want a turn with the light pen.